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Barbara Brabec’s
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Personal Musings about Life

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November 2025

My Decade-Long “Valley Experience”
~ Reflections from Barbara’s 1997 Journal ~

I thought I was at my rope’s end in 1994 when God brought me to my knees, but I felt even worse three years later when I poured out my heart in this story about my decade-long “valley experience.”

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“I’ve never been as discouraged or felt as emotionally broken as I do right now. I can’t explain why nothing I’m doing in my professional life is working right. It’s as if God (or Satan?) has put a big STOP sign in front of my door and is letting nothing in. If this is God’s doing, then I don’t know what lesson I’m supposed to be learning, unless it’s humility.”

Oh, Father, can I climb into your lap for a while and cry on your shoulder?

Knowing that you chastise those you love, I figure I’m being run through the fire and being tested in some way, so I’m trying to figure out what I’m supposed to be learning from this particular and very long valley experience. Some things do come to mind. I have no ego left anymore, so if you desired to humble me, you’ve done that.

Thank you, Father, for blessing me so abundantly throughout my life, and thank you now for giving me the faith that you are still with me and looking out for my needs even though I can’t begin to understand where I’m being led. Please know that I’m ready and willing to go anywhere you want me to go and do anything you want me to do.

The above decade‑long “valley experience” was particularly painful because it included the last years of my husband’s life and the first two years of my widow’s journey. Thankfully, in those years, I had enough short trips to the mountaintop to never lose faith that God was directing my path and Harry’s, too.

Lessons Learned in the Valley
~ from my 1997 Journal ~

Big lesson learned: With time comes perspective. The surprising thing about perspective is that the farther away we come from a particular life experience, the more clearly we see the valuable life lessons we learned during that time. Perhaps the hardest lesson Christians must learn is that God’s timing and direction for our lives rarely coincide with the road map we’ve so carefully laid out for ourselves. Now, whenever I do something I believe is God’s will for my life—and the doors I’m trying to walk through either don’t open at all or are quickly slammed shut—I reason that God must not want me walking in that direction, being in contact with this or that person, or doing this or that type of work.

I no longer brood about such stop signs or life detours, but have become more observant and discerning of the signals I receive from God, who has a unique way of communicating with each of us. Because I’ve kept journals throughout my life, I often review those times when I was feeling lost and slipping back onto the old Road of Discouragement. I am always uplifted when I find written evidence of how God brought me out of a particular valley with a special blessing or something I thought at the time was nothing less than a miracle.

“If you want to stay healthy as a Christian, you need to go back and remember what God has done for you in the past. You need to polish the monuments to the great victories in your life. That’s among the wonderful reasons for keeping a journal.” – David Jeremiah, from his book, A Bend in the Road.

Once we’ve made an attitude adjustment and then try to view our life from God’s perspective, it’s not difficult to look back over our entire lifetime and see all the doors God has opened and closed for us along the way. We might also see the many blessings we’ve had in our lives, even as we were learning one new painful lesson after another. I would not want to relive the decade‑long valley experience described above, but I’m grateful for all I learned in those years.

Although the road ahead looks foggy and challenging in many ways, my strong faith and trust in Christ have given me the peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7) and enabled me to deal with anything coming down the pike.

Two Decades of Widowhood
~ 2025 Update ~

One of the most important lessons I learned as a widow was how perfect God’s timing is. Since I was ten years younger than Harry, I always believed I would outlive him by ten or twenty years. When I’d been widowed for a decade, I journaled, “I begin to see now that God took Harry when He did because He wanted me to do things I couldn’t have done if he were still in my life.”

Then I journaled a list of all I’d done as a widow that would have been impossible as Harry’s wife. In a story I may share later, I’ll tell you about all the things I was able to do as a widow, which I hope will offer perspective that might help other widows see God differently as they grieve the loss of their spouse. By then, I had learned the truth in this Bible verse and memorized it as a verse to live by:

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV).

February 3, 2025 marked the twentieth year of my widowhood, and I haven’t spent more than a day or two in “the Valley” during all those years. Sure, I’ve been discouraged at times, and sometimes challenged beyond my ability to deal with one life problem or another without some help, but God gave me two younger sisters and surrounded me with so many new friends and helpers, plus a new church family, that I can always count on getting the advice, encouragement or physical help I need to live with peace and contentment in my heart.

I continue to count my blessings every day and go forward with the sure and certain knowledge that God is doing the driving and knows the way. All I have to do is hold onto the wheel.

P.S. Visit the HOME page for Timely Quotes and links to Featured Articles of the month. Thanks for linking others to Barbara Brabec’s World.

Archived Brabec Bulletins
Publication of the Brabec Bulletin ceased in
June 2025, after 25 years of publication.
Year 2021-2022 <=>  Year 2023  <=>  Year 2024 <=> Year 2025

Brabec Bulletin Tidbits on Life are archived here.

Musings About Life Posts
Published in 2025
Earlier Posts are archived here.

October 2025:  Moving Forward as You Cope with Change and Uncertainty: Reflections from Barbara’s Journals and Articles. What I learned each time things in my life changed, forcing me to move to a new area of life outside my comfort zone.

September 2025:  The Importance of Numbering Our Days: 2nd in a series of Bible Study Lessons from Barbara’s Journals. If we approach the end of our life with limited years left, we should be careful about how we live. For the Christian, that means asking, “How am I doing with God?”

August 2025: Enoch, Methuselah, and Noah’s Flood. First in a Series of Bible Study Lessons from Barbara’s Journals. This month’s Musings shares keen biblical insight from two of my favorite pastors. You’ll learn more about them and the three Godly men named in the title.

July 2025: Eat, Drink, and Be Merry! What the Bible Has to Say About Food and Drink. Two short Bible study lessons and stories from my 2015 computer journal.

June 2025: Bible Lessons Learned from Three Powerful Evangelistic Sermons: Of Scribes and Chronicles, The Procedure of Faith, and On Whom Do You Lean for Support. Three examples of how I get more from Bible Study by journaling what I’m learning and then incorporating notes taken as I read related books and listen to or watch sermons by favorite pastors.

May 2025: Dealing with Grief and Sorrow When You Lose a Loved One. In 1978, when two of my friends died within days of one another, I suddenly had to face the reality that no life lasts forever. These two deaths taught me much about grief and sorrow, and this is what I learned from this life-changing experience.

April 2025: What Are Your Spiritual Gifts and God’s Will for Your Life? How I came to know God’s will for my life and the spiritual gifts I’d been given.

March 2025: The Bullet That Changed the World. The attempted assassination of Donald Trump before his election changed not only his feelings about God and religion, but also how he would govern and begin to change the world as President.

February 2025: Drawing New Meaning from Life Experiences. Perspective on looking back at your life to see how it’s playing out, ways to grow old gracefully, Bible prophecies coming true, and 5 rules for joyful living.

January 2025: How to Chronicle Your Life or Specific Time In It. Ever think about what you want to do with the rest of your life? If you decide to start a new life endeavor or move into a new area of learning and growth, putting your plans in writing will help you achieve your goal.

Copyright © 2025 by Barbara Brabec. All Rights Reserved.